I’d been patting myself on the back for drinking loads of water during the week and was even getting a little smug about my new found healthy lifestyle. So when the angelic young nurse gives me the verdict I’m mortified.
“Two litres of water every single day,” she stresses. “You need to protect your kidneys.”
And it made perfect sense. I’d felt myself drying out from the inside. I’d wake up in the middle of the night with a parched throat and reach for my water glass. My body has been trying to give me the message for ages. I’m just not listening properly. It’s that funny disconnect habit.
“You’re looking so well,” my friends tell me. My Leo pride laps it up. They aren’t lying to me. I feel well and after my weekly chemo day of taking it easy, I’m pretty much back to normal…except that I am on heavy treatment and my body needs a whole lot more love and attention. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not about to go into victim mode. I need to be out and about, seeing friends and enjoying life to the full. Fun and laughter are like gentle rain to my spirits. My energy wilts in isolation. But one glass of bubbly at special occasions is enough. That extra glass is over the top and adds to the drying effect. At three am, when I wake up to a desert in my mouth, I know that for sure!
The body talks clearly. Its my job to listen. What’s so hard about that? It’s this superwoman complex. Somewhere along the line, I’ve got it into my head that I need to be her. But I’m not and never have been. In fact, right now I need to curl up in someone’s lap and let them take care of me. Archie hasn’t been around much lately. There’s a new cat on the block and his territory is under threat. I’m no longer in danger and he needs to do what he needs to do. Perhaps he has supercat syndrome.
But the early hours bathroom visit is accompanied by a soft patter. When I crawl back under the covers, I feel a warm bundle snuggling against my back. Concentrated kneading makes me want to fling my arms around the little hunter and squeeze. But I don’t. That would be an instant turn off and he’d be gone in a flash. I’m tuned into Archie’s signals. Now if I could just do the same for my own…